At precisely 9:45am, a crack team of tree-huggers shambled across the Heathrow tarmac and climbed the steps of an empty A320 Airbus.
The only impediment to their attack on the Boeing 777 came when one of them briefly stopped to retie his natural fibre organic spaghetti shoelaces before rejoining his fellow vegetarians.
On reaching their target, the hippies strung a banner whinging about saving the whale across the tailfin of the Cessna 172.
One eco-terrorist described the hijack as "an act of defiance against the industrial-military complex ... neo-fascists ... police state ... line in the sand ... God I feel so weak ..." before being led away by men in white coats.
Police were said to be force-feeding the dangerous criminals on
cheeseburgers and fries in order that they could stand up unassisted.
The closing date for consultation on Heathrow's proposed new runway is 27 February 2008.
No nutters please.
