Tickle Me Tuesday

So Wendy Alexander has been resigned as leader of the Scotch Labour Party. Who could have seen that coming? Apparently not the Scotch Labour Party. Her decision to quit "came as a shock to her colleagues", who nevertheless wasted no time queuing up to take her place.

EUrocrats have banned a market trader from selling Kiwi fruits because they are 1mm too small. He can't even give them away, so he'll have to pay to have 5,000 of them destroyed. Can someone remind me why the Lisbon Treaty is supposed to be a "good thing"?

The English Football Association (motto: "we know FA about football") has conceded that Engerland is never going to win the World Cup again, and consequently banned competitive football matches for children. Might as well start as you mean to go on.

Plans are also afoot to take away pointy sticks from javelin throwers, force prospective Olympic swimmers to wear armbands and replace real horses with hobby horses at Ascot - can't have those big beasts giving the wee jockeys a nasty kick.

Thank goodness there's still Wimbledon, that's what I say. (Click to enlarge)

Toot toot!

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