Time For Calm Reflection

What is the world coming to? I cannot believe that the entire religion of Islam is under threat from a children's teddy bear, yet that seems to be the jist of the argument coming from Sudanese fundamentalists this week, who are now running amok in the streets calling for the immediate execution of schoolteacher Gillian Gibbons.

Thank goodness for the voice of reason. Tory MP Boris Johnson has rightfully described these reactionary forces as "utterly bonkers". Mind you he also claims that "There was a time when Britain would have sent a gunboat to rescue her".

Um, Boris, old chap, Khartoum is 400 miles inland. True, it lies on the Nile, at the junction of the White Nile and Blue Nile, but that's a hell of a long way to send a gunboat. By the time you got there, there wouldn't be much left to rescue except for a pile of bleached bones.

Not that the Sudanese still go in for cannibalism, God forbid! There hasn't been a single recorded case of that since, lessee, 1993. Ok, bad example.

Still, they should calm down and take a leaf from Western tradition. You don't hear about God-fearing Christians getting all hot under the collar over a disagreement about how their children should be educated. No, wait.

Still, with any luck she'll be out of there and on her way home in just over a week.

Unless they find the other toy first.